Kaput
by LoveShinobi-Angelv
Summary: Some people just weren't meant to be alone, especially after knowing how great life could be with the one you love.
1. Despondency

**Kaput**

_Chapter One_

-Despondency-

Sakura sat beneath her favorite cherry blossom tree in the park and stared out at the pond, watching the baby ducks play with each other and the children feeding them from the bridge, giggling at the ducklings' antics. Whereas normally this would make her smile, at the moment all it did was piss her off. Why the hell did everyone else get to be happy when she herself was miserable?

She picked up one of the fallen blossoms and began to rip the petals off, tossing them aside before starting on a new one. She felt someone else's presence come next to her, but continued to rip off petals and ignore them. If they wanted to talk to her then they could initiate the conversation. She wasn't in the mood.

"U-um, Sakura-chan, would you mind if I sat next to you?" Hinata's timid voice asked.

"Go right ahead Hinata. You are one of the few people who actually cares about my feelings and what I think." The pink haired woman said, sounding bitter.

Hinata just sat down and crossed her legs, looking out at the water as the sun began to set on the horizon. "I know you are upset Sakura-chan, but try to cheer up. Things will get better."

Sakura whirled on her friend, anger evident in her emerald gaze. "Will they Hinata? Cause' I highly doubt it."

"You just have to have faith."

"Would you have faith if Naruto broke up with you for some stupid reason that doesn't even make sense?" she asked. At the saddened look that came across the Hyuuga's face, Sakura nodded. "Exactly. I haven't even spoken to Gaara since then, not that I want to." She lied, looking back over the pond.

Sakura drew her legs to her and wrapped her arms around them, resting her chin on her knees. "I don't think he wants anything to do with me anymore, and that's why he broke it off." She said softly. "He got tired of me, and that was the nicest thing he could come up with to say instead of the truth."

Hinata placed her hand on the other woman's shoulder. "That's not true Sakura-chan, nobody could ever get tired of you, you're one of the best people I know."

"Sasuke got tired of me."

"Sasuke left the village, he got tired of everybody." The ebony haired woman reasoned. "But he came back, and is now better friends with everyone than he was before he left, even you."

"True." She sighed, looking at Hinata. "I'm sorry I snapped at you. I'm just…not ready to be happy yet. I might never be." She smiled apologetically.

"Don't worry about it." Hinata returned her smile. "Everyone moves on at their own pace. It has only been a month after all. I don't blame you." She stood then, brushing the flower petals off of her clothes. "Come on, we'll be late for the dinner." She offered her hand down to Sakura, who took it and stood.

"Yeah, we should be going." She said, and both of the girls headed towards the restaurant that they were to meet everyone at. Every month everyone from their academy days met someplace to share a meal together, and they made sure never to schedule anything then, so that they could all catch up. It was a tradition that Naruto had started shortly after Sasuke's return to the village, since he wanted everyone to be such good friends that nobody left for any reason.

They walked through the streets of Konoha, until they came upon a casual restaurant and went inside, walking past the host and to their regular table. They met here every time, since it was the only place other than Ichiraku that served quality ramen, according to Naruto. When they reached the private party room, Sakura stopped dead in her tracks and felt her heart stop at what she saw.

There, sitting at the head of the table, was Gaara, and he looked _happy_. Well, happy for him anyways. It appeared that he was chuckling at something that Sasuke had said, since the last Uchiha had a smirk on his face. The blood ran cold in her veins as she and Gaara made eye contact, and she wondered if he would say anything or not. Her question was soon answered.

"Hey Sakura."

The air in her lungs quickly left her as she was left flabbergasted at the casual way in which he greeted her. "Hey." She said softly, moving to take her seat at the opposite end from the redhead. In that moment she wished she had gotten here earlier, so that she wouldn't have to look at Gaara any time she wanted to look up or forward.

Naruto leaned out and smiled at his friend as Hinata sat next to him. "Isn't it great Sakura-chan? Gaara had to come visit Tsunade-baa-chan for some reason or other, and he gets to stay in town for a few days!" the blonde declared.

"Yeah, that sounds nice." She said, picking up her menu and hiding her face behind it, pretending that she didn't know what she was going to get, even though she got the same thing every time. She just didn't want anyone to see her face as she tried to collect herself.

Why? Why did he have to come here now, before she'd had time enough to _try_ to move on? That wasn't even the worst part. The worst part was that he looked completely fine, like her presence didn't affect him at all. It was as if they had never even been a couple, as if he had never said that he wanted her to be his.

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before lowering her menu and setting it back down on the table. She placed her hands in her lap and stared at the tablecloth in front of her, not even making any attempt to talk to anyone. She didn't want to talk. She just wanted to go home, curl up into a ball, and cry.

Gaara's slightly light demeanor vanished and he moved his attention from the Uchiha to the pink haired woman at the other end of the table. He frowned slightly and said something that made Sakura's eyes widen in pure horror. "Are you alright Sakura?"

She mentally cursed and visibly cringed. Damn him. He _would_ call her out in front of everyone and make her the center of attention, since now all eyes were on her. "Of course I'm okay." She waved it off and smiled, although it was strained. And fake. "I just don't feel all that well."

"Oh well then would you like me to take you home? You know you only get cranky when you don't feel well and you stay awake. You should probably just get some rest." He said without thinking and then froze, lowering is hand to his lap.

Hurt stabbed through her. It seemed he didn't even want her to eat with them, and was trying to get her to leave. Well, she wouldn't give him the pleasure. If she had to be uncomfortable then so did he. "No, I am well enough that I can stay and eat with _my_ friends." She said softly before looking away and taking a sip from her glass of water.

His eye visibly twitched and everyone shifted their nervous and uncomfortable gaze from the pink haired woman to the redhead. "I was only suggesting since you get really _bitchy_ when you're ill." He said sharply, taking the napkin from the table and flapping it out loudly and harshly before placing it in his lap.

She loudly placed her glass back on the table. "Only to those who don't know how to feel, nor have emotions." She said lowly.

"If they didn't have feelings or emotions why would it matter to them since they wouldn't care." He glared back at her.

"If they didn't care, then they should just shut their trap and mind their own business."

"So!" Kiba laughed awkwardly. "How about the weather today huh? Whoo! Some crazy stuff!"

Sakura glared at Gaara before looking to the brunette. "Didn't really notice." She said, sitting back in her chair and crossing her arms.

He laughed again, getting odd looks from the others. "Yeah, heh, you know that sun. Right Ino?" he nudged his companion, who gave him a confused look, and at his expression she nodded quickly.

"Oh yeah. Totally weird."

Naruto frowned, not understanding. "What are you guys talking about? The sun is always there in the daytime. It looks the same as it always does."

"Stupid." Sasuke muttered, shaking his head.

The blonde glared at the Uchiha. "I'm not stupid, they are!" he pointed to Kiba and Ino. "They're the ones talking about the sun as if they'd never seen it before!"

"Naruto I hear they have a new flavor of ramen." Neji interjected quickly.

He perked up at this and began to frantically look through the menu. "Really? What kind? Have you tried it? Did it already come out? Ho-" he froze then as his eyes widened. "Pizza flavor?" he declared, leaning closer to the menu to make sure he was reading it correctly. "Oh my God, I think I just died and went to Heaven."

Gaara simply rolled his eyes and stole another glance at his last and only ex-girlfriend. Sakura just happened to be glancing at him in that moment, and when their eyes met, she quickly looked away, her emerald depths filled with sadness. He sighed and stood, excusing himself from the table, saying something about having forgotten to take care of something with the Hokage.

Despite everyone's protests, the redhead left anyways. Sakura didn't say anything to try and get him to stay, nor did she look at him again. Once he was gone and the dinner got underway, the conversation and mood seemed to pick up, though Sakura remained quiet. When they finished eating, she paid and stood, telling everyone that she was just going to go home instead of join them for drinks.

Hugging herself, she watched the ground as she made her way home, walking the dark, empty streets of the city. After entering her apartment she kicked off her boots and went straight to her room, curling up on her bed and letting loose her unshed tears. Before now it had gotten to the point where she didn't cry at night anymore, but because she had seen Gaara again, all of her pain came back full force. She hugged her pillow to her body, curling around it in an attempt to rid herself of the pain. Hopefully she wouldn't see him again while he was here, and then she could go back to wallowing in her sorrow.


	2. Admittance

**Kaput**

_Chapter Two_

-Admittance-

The next morning Sakura got up and showered, getting ready for the day as she usually did, though she was still upset about everything that had happened the night before. On top of that, she was confused, and that only made her angry, because she hated being confused. And the best person to talk to when she was confused about a man was none other than Yamanaka Ino.

After locking her apartment behind her, she headed straight to the Yamanaka flower shop. Walking through the door, she went right up to the counter, where the blonde was filing her nails. "Ino, I need your advice." She said, setting her elbow on the counter and resting her head in her hand.

"Ok." She replied, not even glancing up from her task. "What's up Forehead?"

"I don't understand what Gaara's problem is." She frowned, straightening. "I mean, first, he breaks up with me when I had taken three weeks off to visit him. Three weeks!" she threw her arms into the air. "Saying that we shouldn't be together anymore because of the distance, which is stupid." She began to pace. "I mean, we dated for a year and a half. I even let him be my first, and he just ends it like that. I never heard anything from him, and then all of a sudden he's in Konoha and acting like nothing ever happened." She slammed her hands on the counter, pausing in her rant.

"Did you see him at dinner? He was acting happy, and then he treated me like I was supposed to be his best buddy and not be upset about what he did. He even had the gall to act like he didn't understand why I was upset last night, when everyone else knew, except for Naruto, but he's an idiot."

"Why do you care?" Ino sighed, looking up at her friend finally.

"It's not fair, that's why I care. How could he move on so quickly, and yet I'm stuck in this pit of depression." She frowned. "He should be suffering too."

"Then why don't you make him suffer?" the blonde asked, returning to her previous task. "No man, no matter how devoid of emotion, can forget what good sex was. You should just go out with someone else and make him jealous."

Sakura's eyes widened. "You think that will work?"

She shrugged. "Why wouldn't it?"

"Well, I've never done anything like that before. I wouldn't even know who to go on a date with. It's not like I ever had any luck with men before I dated Gaara, and even now, there isn't anyone who has really shown any interest in me."

Ino waved her off. "You don't worry about that. I know someone who likes you. And don't worry, it's not Lee or Shino. Just show up at the Danku Café tonight at seven thirty. I promise you won't be disappointed. He's cute."

"Okay." The pink haired woman perked up slightly. "Thanks Pig, you're the best." She hugged her friend across the countertop, disrupting the blonde's task.

"Yeah, yeah." She laughed and hugged her back. "Now get out of my flower shop. Kiba's coming in for a _special_ delivery. If you catch my drift." She wagged her eyebrows suggestively to the pink haired woman.

"You two are incorrigible." She rolled her eyes before walking to the door. "Have fun!" she waved, leaving the shop.

As she walked down the streets, she clasped her hands behind her back and looked to the sky, the corner of her mouth tilting up slightly. This plan was perfect. She would go on her date with this cute boy and make Gaara jealous. She might even come to like the guy, and that would make it easier for her to get over her breakup with the redhead.

Her eyes widened slightly when she realized that she didn't really have anything to wear, and so she changed directions and went into one of the nicer stores and bought herself something that was cute and casual at the same time. It wasn't that she didn't have plenty of clothes at home in her closet, but the way she figured it, this was the perfect excuse to buy some new ones. While she had been in the store, she saw that they were having a sale on lingerie, and so had bought some new sets of bras and underwear.

So excited about her new clothes, she headed home with a genuine smile on her face, since shopping always made her happy. Once she got home, she changed into her new outfit, which consisted of a strapless red bra and the matching underwear, a nice pair of dark skinny jeans with flats, and a red halter top that revealed a bit of her stomach. It was odd, she had bought the shirt because Gaara had said she looked beautiful in red, but just as that thought entered her mind she banished it. She put on a bit of makeup and fluffed her hair to give it some volume before grabbing her small clutch and heading out her door.

She walked down the street in the direction of the restaurant at a leisurely pace, since she was a little early. But she never liked to be late, so she always made sure that she would arrive exactly on time. She slowed her pace, trying to control her reaction. She had to have the worst luck in the whole world. There, walking towards her, was Gaara. He stopped, looking shocked, mostly by her appearance. "Why are you dressed like that?" he asked, sounding guarded, and looking far from happy.

"I'm going on a date." She said simply, schooling her expression so that she didn't show her guilt at deceiving him. She never did like to lie.

She saw the visible change in his appearance. He turned pale and actually looked angry. "What? With who?"

She shrugged. "I don't know, some guy that Ino picked out for me. But she said he was really cute, so I have high hopes." She smiled slightly. Hurt flashed across his face and he did nothing to hide the betrayal.

"You're already dating?"

Sakura frowned, since this wasn't the reaction she had been expecting. "This is the first date I've been on since we broke up. I figured it was time to at least try. Why? Are you not seeing anyone in Suna?"

"Of course I'm not." He snapped, retreating slightly and taking a deep breath, trying to calm himself.

"Why not?" she crossed her arms. "You said the reason we couldn't be together was because we lived in different villages and that the distance was too much of a hassle. So I assumed you already had someone in mind. Like that Matsuri girl or something."

The Kazekage just looked repulsed. "That's a horrible thought. Why would I lower my standards from you to her? That's just stupid. How dare you assume I would simply replace you like that."

"Well if I'm so irreplaceable, then why did you break up with me?" she asked, glaring at him. "You can't just break up with someone and not expect them to move on with their life Gaara. That's selfish, and illogical."

"Because," he began, shutting his mouth quickly. "It doesn't matter." He said, trying to stay strong. But it was killing him that she was not with him.

Her glare only increased. "Right, why would I expect otherwise from you? Since my feelings don't matter to you either." She sighed, moving to go around him. "Now if you don't mind, I have somewhere to be." She began to walk away from him, praying that she didn't start to cry and ruin her makeup.

Gaara grimaced and stared forward, allowing her to walk off. He ran his hand down his face, trying to stop the words from spilling out. And for the first time he was unable to control his mouth. "I wanted to marry you." he said, turning slightly to see her frozen and tense back.

Sakura closed her eyes as her entire being was filled with pain and longing. A tear rolled down her cheek, and she took a deep breath, opening her now moist eyes. "Then why did you break my heart?" she whispered, the hurt she was feeling evident in her voice.

He frowned, picturing just how broken she must have looked. "I didn't want to. But I didn't want to take you from your home…I overheard you talking with Tsunade about how much better Konoha was then all the other areas you'd been…and all I want is for you to be happy." He said, sounding strained, as if even he might get choked up.

"Yeah, I can see how well that worked out." She snorted, turning around and giving him a light glare. "I have been nothing but miserable ever since you broke up with me. And how could you assume that by doing that I would be happier? My home is wherever you are Gaara. Or it was." She said, somewhat solemnly.

"Well you were always complaining about the heat when you came to Suna. What was I supposed to assume? You have to give me a break Sakura, I'm not _good_ at anything like this. And if I recall, all you did was run off without even trying to fix us. You could have talked me out of it if you wanted." He pointed accusingly. He knew it hadn't been smart to assume, but he knew Sakura, and she wouldn't just agree with him and give in to what he wanted. And all he really wanted was what she wanted.

"I thought it was what you wanted!" she shouted, throwing her arms in the air. "The way you explained it to me made it sound that way. I figured you were tired of me and didn't want me anymore." She sadly explained. "I even took three weeks off from everything to come and spend time with you, but you broke it off before I could tell you the news. So I came home and just went back to work at the hospital."

"Well whose fault is that? How many times do I have to tell you that you _always_ assume wrong. No matter what you silly girl." He growled out, crossing his arms stubbornly. "The one time in your life where you actually don't say anything."

"Yeah…well, I was crushed, okay? I loved you, I still do. But you just ripped my heart out and didn't even act like it bothered you at all. And then at dinner you seemed perfectly fine with everything, and only made me feel worse because I hadn't moved on." She said, tears filling her eyes. "That's why I'm going out tonight…to try."

"Of course I acted like that. Don't you know me at all?" he glared, growing only angrier. "I love you, and I hate seeing you in any kind of sadness. Do you know how horrible it was for me to tell you that and watch you leave, thinking about you all the time? Like how when you slowly wake up in the morning, you move closer to me and press your soft palms against my chest. Or when you surprise me at the office, or when I'm in a meeting, pissing off all the elders."

She looked up at him, searching his eyes. For a moment it looked like she was going to apologize, but then she glared at him, pointing a finger in his face. "Don't you try and turn this around on me Sabaku no Gaara. With your sweet words. It's not like I wasn't all the way out here thinking about how you would send me sweet letters every once in a while, or about how you'd hold me close after we made love, and run your fingers through my hair to calm me down."

He grabbed her finger and lowered it, stepping forward and closing the space between them. "I can't read your mind Sakura, I know you think I should be able to but I cannot. I heard what I heard, and I couldn't take you from here. It became painful to be with you knowing that we could never take it to the next step." He took a deep breath and seemed to ready himself for his next statement. "I never stopped loving you…and I will never love anyone again…but if you need to move on, I am not going to stop you. I only want you to be happy."

She let out a sigh, and looked up at him sadly. "Gaara, don't you understand? I will never be happy if we aren't together, and I will never love anyone the way I love you. But if being with me hurts you, then I understand. You've endured enough pain throughout your life, and I do not wish to add to it."

"But I don't understand." He frowned, looking extremely confused. "Can you not just tell me what you want? I can't figure out all these small emotional puzzles that you give me. I need some help." He admitted.

"I want to be with you, for the rest of my life. I want to marry you, have a family with you, and grow old with you." She said. He brought his hand to her face and held her cheek tenderly.

"So…if I asked you to marry me…you would be alright with moving to Suna?" he asked, still looking skeptical.

A small smile made its way to her lips. "Of course. I told you, my home is wherever you are."

A look of relief washed over the Kazekage's face, and he took both her hands in his and kneeled down on one knee before her. "I don't have the ring with me. But Haruno Sakura, do you want to marry me?" Gaara asked, actually smiling.

"Yes." She smiled, tears pooling in the corners of her eyes. "I would love to."

He stood and pulled her closer, placing his lips over hers in a desperate kiss. "I'm so sorry for ever thinking that leaving you was the best course of action to avoid my pain. It only made things far worse." He breathed out against her lips, cupping her face with his hands and showing her just how much he had missed her.

"Next time just talk to me about it." she placed her hands over his, holding them against her face.

"Next time don't walk away without trying to find out my reasoning. You may be able to talk me out of something foolish." He laughed lightly and kissed her once more. They pulled away then, and Gaara rested his forehead against hers. "So why don't you ditch this guy and come spend the evening with me? Then we can go back to your house and…" he paused, slipping one of his hands from hers and smoothing it down her side. "We can make up this last month to each other."

"Or," she said, wrapping her arms around his neck and pressing against him. "We can just go back to my house now and start making up for our time apart. I do have an entire new selection of lingerie that I bought today that I need to show you. It could take hours." She purred. He visibly shivered, just thinking about what she had in store for him.

"You always were my better half." He smirked, wrapping his arms tightly around her waist. His sand picked up and swirled around them, taking them away to mend their wounded love.


End file.
